Shocking Split

Does "People"-magazine have a new euphemism for 'Vagina'`?

I cun't say ;-)

WTF? IT'S INDEPENDENCE DAY.....

and as such, i give you the following;

Tattoo ad on forehead for $10,000!

A mother had her forehead tattooed with the web address of a gambling site after auctioning off advertising space on her head to pay for her son's school fees. Karolyne Smith has to live with a permanent billboard on her forehead after she accepted Goldenpalace.com's offer of $10,000 for the 'advertising space'. She needed the money to send her son Brady to a private school. Karolyne said: ""I really want to do this. To everyone else, it seems like a stupid thing to do. To me, $10,000 is like a million dollars.", "I only live once and I'm doing it for my son. It's a small sacrifice to build a better future for my son." Karolyne did not take the decision lightly. She discussed it for more than three weeks with her boyfriend Jeremy Williams. Smith's eBay auction attracted more than 27,000 hits and 1,000 watchers. Bidding reached $999.99 before Goldenpalace.com, an Internet gambling company met Smith's $10,000 asking price. Goldenpalace.com also gave her another $5,000 for her trouble. Another person, inspired by Karolyne is currently auctioning his forehead as ad space on ebay.

"i thought about it for around three weeks"
REALLY? AS LONG AS THAT?
FUCKWIT!

WTF : Stupid criminal ;-)

Judgment-Challenged: Howard Shanholtzer was arrested in Garden Grove, Calif., in May in connection with stolen security cameras(sic!). Figuring that police might be looking for his white Mitsubishi pickup truck they probably saw on surveillance video, Shanholtzer allegedly stole another pickup, but for some reason, it was another white Mitsubishi. [Orange County Register, 5-24-08]

WHERE TF IS THIS GENT? I'D LIKE TO SHAKE HIS HAND!

An incident occurred in a supermarket recently, when the following was witnessed: A Muslim woman dressed in a Burkha (A black gown & face mask) was standing with her shopping in a queue at the checkout. When it was her turn to be served, and as she reached the cashier, she made a loud remark about the English Flag lapel pin, which the female cashier was wearing on her blouse. The cashier reached up and touched the pin and said, "Yes, I always wear it proudly. My son serves abroad with the forces and I wear it for him". The Muslim woman then asked the cashier when she was going to stop bombing and killing her countrymen, explaining that she was Iraqi. At that point, a Gentleman standing in the queue stepped forward, and interrupted with a calm and gentle voice, and said to the Iraqi woman: "Excuse me, but hundreds of thousands of men and women, just like this ladies son have fought and sacrificed their lives so that people just like YOU can stand here, in England, which is MY country and allow you to blatantly accuse an innocent check-out cashier of bombing YOUR countrymen". "It is my belief that if you were allowed to be as outspoken as that in Iraq, which you claim to be YOUR country, then we wouldn't need to be fighting there today". "However - now that you have learned how to speak out and criticise the English people who have afforded you the protection of MY country, I will gladly pay the cost of a ticket to help you pay your way back to Iraq". "When you get there, and if you manage to survive for being as outspoken as what you are here in England, then you should be able to help straighten out the mess which YOUR Iraqi countrymen have got you into in the first place, which appears to be the reason that you have come to MY country to avoid." Apparently the queue cheered and applauded.

Three WTF links 4 U

Just three links to kick off WTF Friday today:-

1) Jordan takes up smoking?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/tayside_and_central/7423903.stm

2) Greek club for Members only?
http://www.spiegel.de/international/zeitgeist/0,1518,553070,00.html

3) Welshman Alan Evans gets eaten alive
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,91059-1314893,00.html

Only in Sweden.....

SPOT THE DIFFERENCE...

FOR THE GUYS

FOR THE GALS

you can thank me later!

HOW TF?

Surgeons left metal bar in my headThursday, June 5, 2008

Surgeons left a 10cm (4in) metal bar inside a teenager's head.
Donovan McGowan lived with the piece of metal inside him for three months after an operation.
The 18-year-old suffered from blinding headaches and also had an unsightly lump on the side of his head.
Eventually, he demanded a scan and it was then doctors found the bar.
'They said, “This is quite embarrassing but there is something metallic like a tube still in your head.”
It's been more than embarrassing for me having to walk about with this lump,' said Mr McGowan, from Glasgow.
The rod was left behind during an operation at Southern General Hospital, Glasgow, in March after he was hit by a car.
A hospital spokesman apologised and said it was an 'unfortunate error'. The ex-football steward, who gave up his job because of the pain, may now seek compensation from the trust.

OUCH!

She's not flushed ;-)

Away tomorrow so I'm posting early ...

If

...its not the Germans, it's the Japanese. What is it about people we've been to War with? I can only wonder what kind of news stories would be coming out of South America if we'd ever formally declared war on Argentina back in the day....

"TOKYO (Reuters) - A Japanese man who was mystified when food kept disappearing from his kitchen, set up a hidden camera and found an unknown woman living secretly in his closet, Japanese media said Friday.

The 57-year-old unemployed man of Fukuoka in southern Japan called police Wednesday when the camera sent pictures to his mobile phone of an intruder in his home while he was out on Wednesday, the Asahi newspaper said on its Website.

Officers rushed to the house and found a 58-year-old unemployed woman hiding in an unused closet, where she had secreted a mattress and plastic drink bottles, the Asahi said. Police suspect she may have been there for several months, the paper said.

"I didn't have anywhere to live," the Nikkan Sports tabloid quoted the woman as telling police.

Local police confirmed that they had arrested a woman for trespassing, but would not comment further on the case."

Please tell me how the hell someone lives in your cupboard, especially in a place like Japan where the flats/apartments are half the size of the UK's, which are half the size of American apartments and you don't notice for a long time? Does the guy just stumble around in a drunken haze whenever he's home or something? I'm stunned.

Listening to Dave & Ansel Collins :- Double Barrel

Heartbroken Man Climbs Into Morgue Freezer

Won't be here Friday because we're out of town... so I'm putting it up now.

I couldn't resist this... Love was never so cold!!

Sorry for this mix-up--link has been corrected- sorry for the delay!!! :(

Heartbroken Man Climbs Into Morgue Freezer.

Is anyone really worth that??

Carma Sutra book

And the Americans need an instruction manual?

Gives a hole(sic!) new meaning to the word 'pick-up' ;-)





 

So it's true...

So it's true, all those posh BMWs are driven by
 
Bum
Mooning
Wankers.


I suppose we should be grateful that the speedcamera photo was taken in the UK ;-)

(North Tyneside, as you might have expected)

WTF? AND WE LET OUR KIDS PLAY WITH THESE THINGS?

ok, early, but i'll be too busy to post tomorrow....



and if you thought this was funny, check out my early post on SICK SUNDAY !!

I

...got this on Friday, so it counts.

Explanation from my friend and fellow Bastard Chris Rizzo, the unfortunate owner of the hand in the images below.
"wed nite about 10:30. I was doing some carb tuning on ye ole' 900 ss, making adjustments and cruising around my hood. I stop at the signal at 12th and morrison, and the Italian stallion is idling a bit high. ........she's runnin a little bit hot tonight, i can barely see the road from the heat comin' off,.. ease the seat back, reach down between my legs for the idle adjust screw.......WHACK.

oh shit. lift my hand up and see a bloody mangled mess. fingers filleted open and bent every which way but the right way. bikes still running though, so i drop her into gear and ride home. i grab the least greasy rag, drape it over my meat paw and jump in my truck. Four hours later in the ER the hand specialist comes in and says, 'holy shit'. Not a comforting reaction. Up to the operating room to remove my ring finger and the end of my middle finger. The OR is brand new and is equipt with a bumpin' sound system, unfortunately though the doctor happens to like Pink Floyd......

so two days later my bloody stumps and i are home with a fat stash of medical grade narcotics. My bike looks like the Bologna Chainsaw Massacre: a good splattering of blood, some finger meat scattered around the motor, and the belt for the vertical cylinder is completely derailed. Needless to say that probably bent a couple valves on my freshly built head :("





Listening to Weezer - Pork and Beans

I

...love it when traditional martial arts practitioners claim their style "works", and that jiu-jitsu's ok if you get taken down, but it's easy to beat if you stay on your feet.
Check out this dude's attempt to prove said theory.



Listeing to :- Story of a lonely guy - Blink 182

So now you know......

WTF may stand for:

* What the fuck, a common expression of confusion or annoyance, especially in internet slang.

* Waking the Fallen, an album by Avenged Sevenfold

* Werewolf: The Forsaken, a role-playing game developed by White Wolf Game Studio

* World Taekwondo Federation, the International Federation member of the International Olympic Committee for the sporting aspects of taekwondo

* Work Time Fun, a game for the PlayStation Portable

* Working Title Films, a United Kingdom film production company

* Walking Through Fire, album by April Wine

* Weight transfer front, weight transferred to the front of a car during cornering

* wtf, a command line acronym database that first appeared in NetBSD 1.5, and has been ported to many other Unix operating systems

* The Daily WTF, a humorous technology blog, previously known as Worse Than Failure

* WTF Froster, beverage from Mac's Convenience Stores

* Weapons Task Force, creators of the SO Mod for Delta Force: Xtreme

* Where's the Fire, a column on the tech blog Technorati.


World Taekwondo Federation eh? We don't want to upset them.....

WTF? NOPE, STILL DON'T GET IT!

watched it five times now, i still don't know what it's selling! if it is at all!

Pull the other one...

Be on the road friday, so this one's early. But worth it.

Bilingual Olympic Signs ;-)

Some of the chinese signs for the olympics this year have hilarious colloquial translations :-)