A man in Australia is auctioning his life - his house, his job, his clothes and his friends - on eBay, after his marriage broke up, saying he wants to start a new life.
'It's time to move. A completely fresh start. I want to see where life takes me,' Ian Usher, 44, from Perth, told Australian television on Tuesday.
Usher said he was auctioning his life as 'a package' with his house in Perth valued at around £195,000 (A$420,000).
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'Hi there, my name is Ian Usher, and I have had enough of my life! I don't want it any more! You can have it if you like!,' reads his Web site alife4sale.com, which has a link to eBay for bidders.
Usher said his life auction, which starts on June 22, included not only his house, a car, a motorbike, a jet ski and a spa, but also an introduction to 'great friends' and - best of all - a job at a rug shop in Perth for a trial two-week period.
Got to watch this one and see how much he gets for his life!
Friday, 21 March 2008
Hurlum turdum...
Long story short: "A British businessman fed up with being targeted by vandals has installed a 30-foot Roman-style catapult on the premises to hurl bucket loads of chicken manure at vandals attacking his rural offices."
For details see http://www.bookofjoe.com/2008/03/beyond-thunderd.html
For details see http://www.bookofjoe.com/2008/03/beyond-thunderd.html
Saturday, 15 March 2008
Friday, 14 March 2008
We've
...been ripped off, real savage like.
I refer, of course, to Spike TV's new feature, What the @#$% Friday on Spike TV, a cable channel here in the US.
Thieving bastards.
Listening to Face to Face - I'll stop the world and melt with you.
I refer, of course, to Spike TV's new feature, What the @#$% Friday on Spike TV, a cable channel here in the US.
Thieving bastards.
Listening to Face to Face - I'll stop the world and melt with you.
Sodomy now illegal in Holland
Just yesterday, in a change of the local law, Holland banned sodomy (=sex with animals).
A spokesman for the Amsterdam bar "Tight Pussy" stated sheepishly that they will be in for a period(sic!) of reorientation and a change of clientele. Apropos change of clientele,
on the same day the German high court confirmed that incest remains illegal in Germany;
it is also reported that fEWEr family visitors from the United States are expected this year.
OTOH, sodomy has been legal here since 1969 (in Austria since 1971) and in Switzerland for an even longer time, the countries where tup-tup-tup-aware parties thrive ;-)
A spokesman for the Amsterdam bar "Tight Pussy" stated sheepishly that they will be in for a period(sic!) of reorientation and a change of clientele. Apropos change of clientele,
on the same day the German high court confirmed that incest remains illegal in Germany;
it is also reported that fEWEr family visitors from the United States are expected this year.
OTOH, sodomy has been legal here since 1969 (in Austria since 1971) and in Switzerland for an even longer time, the countries where tup-tup-tup-aware parties thrive ;-)
Bound To The Shitter
As seen at http://news.xinhuanet.com/english/2008-03/13/content_7780910.htm
U.S. woman sits on toilet for 2 years |
BEIJING, March 13 (Xinhuanet) -- A U.S. woman spent approximately two years sitting on the toilet in her boyfriend's home before he finally called police for help, according to media reports Thursday.
Ness County Sheriff Bryan Whipple said the 35-year-old woman's skin had grown around the seat. She refused medical services at first but was finally convinced that she needed to be checked out at a hospital.
"We pried the toilet seat off with a pry bar and the seat went with her to the hospital," Whipple said. "The hospital removed it."
"She was not glued. She was not tied. She was just physically stuck by her body," Whipple said. "It is hard to imagine. ... I still have a hard time imagining it myself."
The boyfriend told police he brought the woman food and water and asked her to come out of the bathroom everyday.
"And her reply would be, 'Maybe tomorrow,'" Whipple said. "According to him, she did not want to leave the bathroom."
But the boyfriend never explained why he took two years to make the call.
Whipple also said that investigators planned to present their report to the county attorney, who will determine whether any charges should be filed against the woman's 36-year-old boyfriend.
Police have declined to release the couple's names, but the house where authorities say the incident happened is listed in public records as the residence of Kory McFarren, as media reported.
(Ain't that some shit?!?!) WTF?!?! -AJ
WTF IS THIS KID NOT AS FAMOUS AS THE FUCKING "NUMA NUMA" BLOKE??
i thgought i was a compitent enough drummer, until i saw this.
ok, he loses the beat about half way through, but gets it back fine!
and anyone who can keep up with moonie is ok in my book!
Saturday, 8 March 2008
Friday, 7 March 2008
And Leading the War on Drugs is...
We know there is a big drug problem in the world today, and personally I believe that legalizing it all would be their best bet. The addicts would die off probably, and the dealers would have no reason to be criminals. It would eliminate a whole hell of a mess really.
But instead, officials constantly search for new ways to fight the war on drugs... The funniest two cases, are these.
Oh yes--That will stop it for sure!
2. 'Bum Bot' Robot Cop Drives Away Drug Dealers
An Atlanta bar owner's remote-controlled chicken smoker-chassis robot shoots high-pressure water gun at bums, punks, and dirtbags. <--Really, you gotta read that one!!!
You guys and gals have a fantastic WTF Friday!!!
But instead, officials constantly search for new ways to fight the war on drugs... The funniest two cases, are these.1. New Strategy in War on Drugs: Ban Sale of Tiny Plastic Bags
Seems Chicago thinks they've done it: Tiny plastic bags used to sell small quantities of heroin, crack cocaine, marijuana and other drugs would be banned in Chicago, under a crackdown advanced Tuesday by a City Council committee.Oh yes--That will stop it for sure!
2. 'Bum Bot' Robot Cop Drives Away Drug Dealers
An Atlanta bar owner's remote-controlled chicken smoker-chassis robot shoots high-pressure water gun at bums, punks, and dirtbags. <--Really, you gotta read that one!!!
You guys and gals have a fantastic WTF Friday!!!
Nomen est omen?
I have just learned that the pretty redheaded young socialist member of state parliament in Leipzig is called Miss BONK. Nomen est omen?
No mo grabbo
Italy's Court of Appeal has issued a new hands-off landmark ruling - outlawing men from scratching their crotches in public. The ruling says that blatant scratching or holding is "an act contrary to decorum and public decency".
Superstitious Italian men often hold or touch their private parts for good luck when they see a hearse or to ward off bad luck - the equivalent of touching wood in Britain.
So I guess all Michael Jackson imitators will have to revise their acts ;-)
..................?
A Malaysian court has jailed a woman for following a bizarre cult centred around a giant teapot.
She was sentenced on Monday for declaring herself an apostate while she was still a Muslim, news agency Bernama said.
Apostasy is a criminal offence in mainly Muslim Malaysia, whose state religion is Islam but which tolerates other major religions.
Kamariah Ali, a widow with four children, was arrested in 2005 along with 57 other followers of the cult built around a giant teapot.
The outlawed Sky Kingdom sect, headed by a man who says he is God and owner of everything, believes the teapot has healing properties.
The teapot, which symbolized water's purity and 'love pouring from heaven', was sadly demolished by the government at the time of the arrests.
An Islamic court sentenced Kamariah, a 57-year-old former teacher, to two years in jail after she was found guilty of apostasy and refused to repent, Bernama reported.
'What she did was not within the concept of freedom of religion,' Bernama quoted judge Mohamad Abdullah as saying.
This is not the first time Kamariah has been imprisoned for her teapot-following ways - she was previously jailed in 1992 for the same crime.
Her lawyer, Sa'adiah Din, said: 'This has to stop. They can't be sending her again and again to prison for this.'
She was sentenced on Monday for declaring herself an apostate while she was still a Muslim, news agency Bernama said.
Apostasy is a criminal offence in mainly Muslim Malaysia, whose state religion is Islam but which tolerates other major religions.
Kamariah Ali, a widow with four children, was arrested in 2005 along with 57 other followers of the cult built around a giant teapot.
The outlawed Sky Kingdom sect, headed by a man who says he is God and owner of everything, believes the teapot has healing properties.
The teapot, which symbolized water's purity and 'love pouring from heaven', was sadly demolished by the government at the time of the arrests.
An Islamic court sentenced Kamariah, a 57-year-old former teacher, to two years in jail after she was found guilty of apostasy and refused to repent, Bernama reported.
'What she did was not within the concept of freedom of religion,' Bernama quoted judge Mohamad Abdullah as saying.
This is not the first time Kamariah has been imprisoned for her teapot-following ways - she was previously jailed in 1992 for the same crime.
Her lawyer, Sa'adiah Din, said: 'This has to stop. They can't be sending her again and again to prison for this.'
Friday, 29 February 2008
Illegal Aliens Over London
A STUDENT was left shocked when she checked her tourist snaps of the London skyline - and spotted what looks like a flying saucer.
University Of Exeter academic Karolina-Slavka Mueller was in London for the weekend, when she took some shots with her camera phone of the sights.
But when she looked back at the January 19 night time pictures of Tower Bridge and the London Eye, she was shocked to see an apparent UFO.
And experts claim it is the real thing.
Karolina said in an email: "What's very strange about this is the fact that we didn't actually see this object in the sky while I was taking the photos.
"I only discovered it once I loaded the photos onto my computer as I didn't even look at the photos until then."
The images - taken around 3.50am - were taken eight minutes apart as Karolina and two pals drove through Central London.
The apparent UFO is at an angle and appears to emit a mysterious blue light.
Karolina added: "None of us can come up with a reasonable answer to what this might have been.
"One of my friends, the driver, has grown up in London and he can't find a reasonable answer.
"He says he's never seen anything like it and that there definitely isn't any building in this area that could look like this."
UFO experts have been left scratching their heads over the sighting.
Editor, cameraman and UFO researcher Chris Martin said: "I was looking for evidence that these have been fabricated.
"I couldn't find any evidence. It's unprecedented because she produced three pictures, which seems to show it's flying.
"My own evaluation is that these photographs are genuine and have not been digitally manipulated or hoaxed."
He added: "These photos are, in my opinion as a UFO researcher, absolutely astounding and show a real object seemingly under intelligent control.
"This is a classic flying saucer-shaped UFO."
A Ministry of Defence spokesperson did not comment on the sighting, saying: "The MoD examines reports solely to establish whether UK airspace may have been compromisedby hostile or unauthorised military activity.
"Unless there is evidence of a potential threat, there is no attempt to identify the nature of each sighting reported."
I couldn't copy the pics for the post so here's a link to them. Quite impressive.
THE UFO PICS HERE
Sky news reports :-)
"A man who aimed to walk from Britain to India without spending a penny only got as far as Calais . . ."
He must have a bloody big bladder!
Or did he piss on the Frogs?
Way to go ;-)
He must have a bloody big bladder!
Or did he piss on the Frogs?
Way to go ;-)
WHO T.F. CARES THAT PRINCE HARRY HAS GONE TO WAR?
isn't that what he "signed up" for anyway?
my only concern is the poor fuckers that are stationed with the ginger haired twat! they may as well have fucking targets painted on them....
scrounging little drag on the taxpayers wallet.
your time would be better spent proving what we all know.
that charles aint your dad.
cunts. the lot of em.
happy happy happy!
Dumb criminals ;-)
Still in Australia :
Two armed robbers targeted a Sydney bar on the wrong night ;-)
The men stormed the bar brandishing machetes and wearing balaclavas -
unaware that 50 bikers were in there, (Stu asks: despite there being 50 bikes parked on the street?)
To cut a painful story short, one was caught after trying to escape through a back door. He was later treated in hospital for minor injuries.
The other man ran off bruised but was arrested by police in a street nearby. They were still armed!
Police said they "looked like a good fish dinner; well battered ;-)"
Two armed robbers targeted a Sydney bar on the wrong night ;-)
The men stormed the bar brandishing machetes and wearing balaclavas -
unaware that 50 bikers were in there, (Stu asks: despite there being 50 bikes parked on the street?)
To cut a painful story short, one was caught after trying to escape through a back door. He was later treated in hospital for minor injuries.
The other man ran off bruised but was arrested by police in a street nearby. They were still armed!
Police said they "looked like a good fish dinner; well battered ;-)"
Sorry
...to you animal lovers out there, but this cracked me up.
"Python stalks, eats family's dog in Australia
BRISBANE, Australia — A 16-foot python stalked a family dog for days before swallowing the pet whole in front of horrified children in the Australian tropics, animal experts said today.
The boy and girl, ages 5 and 7, watched as the scrub python devoured their silky terrier-Chihuahua crossbreed Monday at their home near Kuranda in Queensland state.
Stuart Douglas, owner of the Australian Venom Zoo in Kuranda, said scrub pythons typically eat wild animals such as wallabies, a smaller relative of the kangaroo, but sometimes turn to pets in urban areas.
"It actively stalked the dog for a number of days," Douglas said.
"The family that owned the dog had actually seen it in the dog's bed, which was a sign it was out to get it," he added.
"They should have called me then, but (the snake) got away and three or four days later, I was called and went around and removed it" after the dog had been killed, Douglas said.
By the time Douglas arrived, all that could be seen of the dog was its hind legs and tail.
The zoo manager, Todd Rose, said pythons squeeze their prey to death before swallowing it whole. The 5-year-old dog would have been suffocated within minutes.
"The lady who was there threw some plastic chairs at the snake, but you've got to remember that this is about 50 kilograms (110 pounds) of aggressive muscle," Rose said.
Removing the half-swallowed dog could have harmed or even killed the python, Rose said, because dogs have sharp teeth and claws that could do the snake internal damage if it were wrenched out.
The snake was still digesting the dog at the zoo today. It will soon be relocated to the bush, Douglas said."
The python stalked the family for days, the report says. WTF? Why wouldn't you do something before it eats your dog, for fucks sake?
"Python stalks, eats family's dog in Australia
BRISBANE, Australia — A 16-foot python stalked a family dog for days before swallowing the pet whole in front of horrified children in the Australian tropics, animal experts said today.
The boy and girl, ages 5 and 7, watched as the scrub python devoured their silky terrier-Chihuahua crossbreed Monday at their home near Kuranda in Queensland state.
Stuart Douglas, owner of the Australian Venom Zoo in Kuranda, said scrub pythons typically eat wild animals such as wallabies, a smaller relative of the kangaroo, but sometimes turn to pets in urban areas.
"It actively stalked the dog for a number of days," Douglas said.
"The family that owned the dog had actually seen it in the dog's bed, which was a sign it was out to get it," he added.
"They should have called me then, but (the snake) got away and three or four days later, I was called and went around and removed it" after the dog had been killed, Douglas said.
By the time Douglas arrived, all that could be seen of the dog was its hind legs and tail.
The zoo manager, Todd Rose, said pythons squeeze their prey to death before swallowing it whole. The 5-year-old dog would have been suffocated within minutes.
"The lady who was there threw some plastic chairs at the snake, but you've got to remember that this is about 50 kilograms (110 pounds) of aggressive muscle," Rose said.
Removing the half-swallowed dog could have harmed or even killed the python, Rose said, because dogs have sharp teeth and claws that could do the snake internal damage if it were wrenched out.
The snake was still digesting the dog at the zoo today. It will soon be relocated to the bush, Douglas said."
The python stalked the family for days, the report says. WTF? Why wouldn't you do something before it eats your dog, for fucks sake?
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