WTF FRIDAY

Silicone Penis, Moore Bush

2010-03-15T02:20:00.002Z

I haven't had much to contribute lately, but I hit the mother lode.

These are both disturbing in their own way... and all I can say is of course, WTF!!!

First, a man who spent 6 years shooting his dick with Silicone. I give you, "The Blob":
Click At Your Own Risk

And for the enjoyment of men, you can always use a little "Moore Bush".

How to wet your chin ;-)

2010-02-20T18:40:00.002Z

STOP THE SEARCH!

2010-02-10T10:34:00.001Z

ive found the driver!

HA HA HA!

2010-02-06T13:02:00.001Z

do you reckon this belongs to the lady below?

ER....FANCY A CHINESE?

2009-10-27T09:07:00.003Z

CAN SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK SHE IS EATING?

i don't know what it is, but i bet it sure would like to taste it.

????? NO, REALLY, TELL ME SHE ISN'T!

2009-09-26T11:22:00.002+01:00

my never ending thanks to AJ for leading me to this website! i've just spent the last hour or so flicking through it! fucking wonderful!

Store wars as Tesco bans Jedi Knight

2009-09-18T10:09:00.004+01:00

now i'll admit, if i read the sun, then it's at work because there are no decent papers left in the canteen. but this was shown to me this morning, and i couldn't help but share......
funny thing is, it totally reminds me of 4D! listen to sundays radio show, and i'll get him to explain!

By BEN ASHFORD

TESCO has been accused of religious discrimination - after banning a JEDI KNIGHT for wearing a hood.

Members of the Star Wars faith - a religion practised around the world - choose to cover their heads in public.

But the leader of the UK's first Jedi Church was branded a security risk and ejected by three staff after refusing to remove his hoodie at a Tesco in Bangor, North Wales.

Daniel Jones, 23 - also known by his Jedi name Morda Hehol - said: "I told them it was a requirement of my religion but they just sniggered and ordered me to leave.

"I walked past a Muslim lady in a veil. Surely the same rules should apply to everyone." The handbook of the UK Jedi Church, founded by film nut Daniel last year, states: "Jedis must wear a hood up in any public place of a large audience."

Daniel added: "I'll advise worshippers to boycott Tesco if it happens again. They will feel the Force."

A Tesco spokesman said: "We would ask Jedis to remove hoods. Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda and Luke Skywalker all went hoodless without going to the Dark Side."

b.ashford@the-sun.co.uk

PHEW.

2009-08-21T13:08:00.002+01:00

JUST WHAT I ALWAYS WANTED

2009-08-17T15:17:00.002+01:00

THIS'LL COMPLETE MY COLLECTION.

Always wear a condom!

2009-03-13T05:29:00.002Z

Nice place to stay ;-)

2009-03-06T13:14:00.000Z

Valentine's card ;-)

2009-02-18T18:32:00.002Z

Friend of mine in the UK got a great Valentine's day card (which she won't let me scan in). But here's the cover text :-

"Valentine's Day is for Cupid Stunts! ;-)

Meds safety label ;-)

2009-02-13T19:56:00.000Z

Who designs these water fountains???

2009-02-08T17:20:00.001Z

Anybody need a wheel barrow?.....Liar!!!!

2009-02-06T21:52:00.000Z

Got The Fever For The Flavor Of...

2009-01-30T22:36:00.003Z

Mmmmm. I'm luvin it!

Qualified !!!

2009-01-29T20:34:00.000Z

most stupid thieves of the year

2009-01-23T16:15:00.001Z

See the most stupid thieves of the year at :-

http://de.youtube.com/watch?v=KxolDDBoPu0

Strine fun & pun ;-)

2009-01-23T08:56:00.001Z

Quoting CNN :-

"(CNN) -- Police in Australia have arrested a man accused of breaking into an adult shop and having sex with blow-up dolls, it was reported Wednesday.

The 23-year-old allegedly broke into the Laneway Adult Shop in the northen Australian city of Cairns on several occasions, having sex with a doll named "Jungle Jane," the Cairns Post reported.

It earlier quoted the store's owner saying the burglar always cleaned up after himself, but the dolls were dumped unceremoniously in an alleyway behind the store.

"He has been taking the dolls out the back and blowing them up and using the dolls and leaving them in the alley," he said. "It is totally bizarre."

Police have charged the unidentified man, believed to be from the city's Manunda suburb, with four counts of breaking and entering. They told the paper that DNA samples had been recovered from one of the dolls.
"Following intelligence-based inquiries, we attended a Manunda address and made an arrest," police spokesman Jason Chetham said"

--------------------------------------------
Get that last line " A man unda a dress" ;-)

2009-01-15T22:24:00.000Z

Uh?????

Potted the pink ?

2008-12-12T20:56:00.003Z

Gives a (w)hole new meaning to the term 'casting couch' ;-)

Meanwhile, playing on my iPod, Pink ;-)

Skin flick

2008-11-29T11:53:00.003Z

Borrowed from Kees Kennis blog....

World's first testicle cookbook

2008-11-28T19:08:00.001Z

Cooking With Balls
is published as a multimedia e-Book on yudu.com.

Man Beheads Himself With Chainsaw

2008-11-28T19:05:00.000Z

David Phyall, 50, used string to tie the Black & Decker power tool to a leg of a snooker table in his sitting room.

He then taped up the on button and plugged it into a timer, Winchester Coroner's Court was told.

Mr Phyall, who had had a small amount to drink but had not taken any drugs, then lay face up under the snooker table and put the chainsaw against his neck.

He used a piece of the tool's cardboard box to cushion the blades from his neck and then set the timer - usually used to turn lights on and off - to start up the chainsaw for 15 minutes.

When it started, it sliced three-quarters through his neck and into his right shoulder, only stopping when his T-shirt was dragged into the blades.

More details here :-
http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/UK-News/Chainsaw-Death-Suicide-Verdict-Recorded-Over-Irrational-Opposition-To-Repossession/Article/200811315155293?lpos=UK_News_Second_Home_Page_Article_Teaser_Region_6&lid=ARTICLE_15155293_Chainsaw_Death%3A_Suicide_Verdict_Recorded_Over_Irrational_Opposition_To_Repossession

WTF......

2008-11-28T12:43:00.000Z

....is goin' on here????

Mummy just screwed Santa Claus....

2008-11-27T18:41:00.000Z

And a Merry Christmas to you all

obligatory Health & Safety notice ;-)

2008-11-24T07:55:00.001Z

Penis consumed by flesh-eating bacteria :-(

2008-11-20T19:56:00.001Z

Washington state (USA) has agreed to pay $300,000 to an ex-prison inmate whose penis was consumed by a flesh-eating bacteria while he was behind bars....(background music from Psycho!!!!).....ok.

Charlie Manning told The Seattle Times Monday he will have $115,000 left after paying attorney's fees arising from his lawsuit and other bills. He expects to get the money this week.

"It's been a nightmare," Manning said. "I figured I should settle for what I could get because I just want it behind me. It's unreal. It's like something from Mars."

Manning, 61, was serving a 13-month sentence for a drunken fight when he became ill. The prison doctor wrongly diagnosed his symptoms as an allergic reaction to medication. It turned out he had necrotizing fasciitis and the bacteria destroyed his penis and one testicle.

Source: [UPI]

Numb Asses

2008-11-14T23:59:00.003Z

Sorry haven't had much "WTF" to share lately. I thought this was good for a laugh.

2008-11-13T23:29:00.001Z

A woman has been charged over an epic drinking session where she apparently stole drinks, stripped naked, kicked and bit police and flooded her cell.
Lori Brutsche-Ely, was arrested on Halloween night after reports that she was stealing beer from customers in a nightclub.
She also exposed herself to a band playing at the venue, picked fights and refused to leave, claim police.
When police found her she was completely naked and was shouting at security guards outside the Mint nightclub, the US newspaper Idaho Mountain Express reported.

She allegedly kicked a security guard in the groin and later attacked a police officer.
One victim is reported as saying: "We were still trying to control the female when I felt pain in my left shoulder.
"I looked and observed the woman biting me."
When in jail police said she trashed a sprinkler, flooding the cell and attacked and bit a prison officer.
Sounds like one hell of a night. Fortunately the officer had a tetanus shot, and Brutsche-Ely had this wonderful picture taken.
Smile!

Did Di die?

2008-11-07T09:24:00.001Z

Magic hands? WTF?

2008-11-07T09:22:00.000Z

WTF? Another suitable name ;-)

2008-10-25T12:01:00.002+01:00

Sometimes people have names very fitting to their situation.

How about this banker ?

What a name!

2008-10-10T08:54:00.002+01:00

Michael,

your parents must have hated you; I'd change my name if I were you ;-)

Butter's Gone Rotten

2008-10-03T17:09:00.001+01:00

I give my heart to Johnny anyway... I'll still eat his butter. ;)

OW, OW, OW!!!! MY HAT IS RAISED TO YOU SIR!!

2008-10-02T12:48:00.002+01:00

ok, a day early, but i wanted to be the one to post this story!
and it's up on my webpage too, i was that impressed!
the thought, "only in england" was the first to come to mind.

here 'tis

A man who sliced his arm off in a freak chainsaw accident calmly knocked on his next door neighbour's door and said: "Please help, I've just cut my arm off,".
John Stirling is believed to have been cutting a tree when his chainsaw slipped and cut his arm off below the elbow in Telscombe Cliffs, near Brighton, East Sussex, yesterday morning.
His neighbour, Steve Francis, told how Mr Stirling turned up on his doorstep after the accident. Mr Francis said he placed the arm in a bag containing frozen pastries to help keep the limb cold.
Mr Francis, 49, told the Brighton Argus: "He wasn't screaming, he was as relaxed as can be. I didn't realise anything was wrong until I looked down and saw his arm missing.
"I ran inside to call the ambulance and he sat outside on a stool. I came out and tied his arm up with a belt and towels. The ambulance people talked me through it.
"But through it all he sat there talking away like it was normal. When the ambulance came they put him on a stretcher and asked where the arm was.
"The paramedics were working on him so I went up the road and put it in a plastic Tesco shopping bag. I then put it in another bag with frozen pastries in to keep it cold.
"Then I gave the bag to one of the paramedics and they took it to hospital in the ambulance. He's a brave man, I'll give him that. I couldn't believe he didn't faint."
Mr Stirling was taken to the Royal Sussex County Hospital in Brighton before being transferred to the Queen Victoria Hospital in East Grinstead, West Sussex.
He underwent 14 hours of specialist emergency surgery last night and a spokesman at the hospital today described him as being "very well".
The spokesman added: "He is comfortable and the early indications are that the procedure went well."
A spokeswoman for South East Coast Ambulance Service confirmed that crews attended Ambleside Avenue, Telscombe Cliffs, at 11.14am yesterday.
She said: "It was a traumatic injury which caused a lower arm amputation."
A spokesman for the Queen Victoria Hospital in East Grinstead said the lengthy surgery involved trying to reattach the limb.
"It is early days but we are hopeful it has been a success," he said.

ouch!

FOOD TO BLOW?

2008-09-26T08:51:00.000+01:00

A pack of hotdogs posed such a threat at a stadium in Philadelphia that the whole building had to be evacuated.

Fans enjoying the match at the Citizens Bank Park had to be rushed out during the game when several suspicious packages wrapped tightly in duct tape were found outside of the buildings ticket office.

A bomb squad was called and discovered that the boxes were full of hotdogs.

However, officials didn't want to take any chances, and the hotdogs were detonated.

A police official investigating the incident said: "It was clear from when we looked at it at first glance and when you looked at the debris afterwards, there was packaging and duct tape; I don't see many hot dogs sold here with duct tape. We just did what we felt was appropriate

Bristol Palin's Barbie Doll ;-)

2008-09-26T08:24:00.000+01:00

Your dirty mind

2008-09-26T08:20:00.000+01:00

Crap job, that!

2008-09-19T18:27:00.000+01:00

Look it's nearly Friday all right!!!

2008-09-13T00:07:00.002+01:00

Being pissed I missed the cut off. Gimme a break!!! This is the closest I've got to Friday for fucking ages....

How do you fuck a tree without getting splinters?

For Sale: Michael Jackson's Undies

2008-09-11T08:00:00.001+01:00

I saw this on the news yesterday morning, and I just thought it was bizarre! Who the hell would want... oh nevermind, asking "why" in this day and age just doesn't seem to do any good. Let's just "LOL". ;) [and it's close enough to Friday for me]

Michael Jackson's Underwear Going Up For Auction On Ebay | AHN | September 11, 2008

Posted using ShareThis

ok it's Sunday but WTF?

2008-09-07T22:50:00.004+01:00

In a statement from Iraq a British officer admitted ammunition was at a premium but insisted troops would improvise as required.....

Plane overbooked? ;-)

2008-08-31T05:38:00.002+01:00

Oz airlines alledgedly are renowned for employing a high percentage of homosexuals.

That having been said, you need to go read

this hilarious story :-

Mike who?

2008-08-29T10:35:00.000+01:00

shiiiiiiiiiit!....it really was Tyson!!!!!!!

Kinda Heavy

2008-08-23T05:42:00.001+01:00

A Texas woman is accused of killing her two-year-old nephew but prosecutors do not yet know how to get her to jail and court - because she weighs nearly HALF A TON !

Mayra Lizbeth Rosales, from La Jola, Texas, is bedridden and weighs nearly 1,000lbs.

But she cannot get through her front door to be taken to jail and, later, court.

----------------------------------------------------

Her excuse? She "slipped and fell on him". WTF?

FUCKING ROCKERS......*

2008-08-22T11:56:00.002+01:00

AC/DC 'leaked song' shocker. (courtesy of classic rock's website)
"The Clog is indebted to the Brave Words & Bloody Knuckles website for alerting us to the following report from Andrew Ramadge at News.com.au:
Perhaps driven insane by an eight-year wait for new material, die-hard AC/DC fans have sunk to a hilarious new low in rock and roll fandom.
In the same week that songs from U2's upcoming album were leaked online, fans of the Australian heavy metal pioneers have given the world a preview of AC/DC's new single Rock 'N' Roll Train – played on air guitar.
Fans who attended a film-clip shoot in London last week were among the first in the world to hear the new song and, instead of leaking an unauthorised recording, have set about recreating it themselves on YouTube.
One video shows a fan dressed as Brian Johnson singing Rock 'N' Roll Train in his bedroom. Another clip features a fan 'singing' the song's main guitar riff in a series of 'nah, nah, nah' noises.
Yet another clip shows a fan playing the song on guitar, after having the riff described to him by a friend who was at the film shoot.
Rock 'N' Roll Train' is the first single from AC/DC's new album Black Ice, set to be released in October.
Last week four songs from the upcoming U2 album, rumoured to be titled No Line On The Horizon, were leaked on YouTube and then taken down.
Rather than the usual culprits, such as advance album copies and industry insiders, the source of the leak was apparently Bono himself. A fan walking past the U2's singer's villa in southern France noticed the album was playing and stopped to record it on a mobile phone.
But back to AC/DC.
You can watch a curious Italian chap (at least we think he's Italian) trying to emulate 'Beano' Johnson here.
And you can listen to an even more curious northern bloke attempting to sing Rock 'N' Roll Train (and, er, speculate what the lyrics are about) here.
Mad, innit?!"

*i must admit a passion for AC/DC how else do you think i came across this tale?

WTF? AMERICAN IDIOT!

2008-08-14T14:14:00.003+01:00

An Ohio man with a hatred of paper money slapped down $8,000 in coins at a car dealership to buy a Chevrolet pick-up - then paid the rest by cheque.
James Jones, 70, produced 16 coffee cans full of coins to buy his new Chevrolet Silverado in Cincinnati and staff spent 90 minutes counting it.
But his coin hoard only covered half of the $16,000 (£8,500) price tag.
The man's son said the most amazing thing for him was his father deciding to replace his 1981 pick-up at all.
As far back as he could remember, Dennis Jones told the Cincinnati Enquirer, his father had always had coins.
“He gave me lunch money in coins and each time he ever gave me money it was in coins,” he recalled.
Paper money will burn, but it is hard to damage coins
James Jones
“I am amazed that we were able to talk him into buying a new truck, because he is pretty tight with his money.”
According to the paper, James Jones walked into the Jake Sweeney dealership, plunked down his cans and said: “I want that Chevy truck.”
"In my 19 years in this business I have never seen anything like this,” said Biff Arnold, finance manager for Jake Sweeney.
“I have seen many buyers come in with a lot of cash money, but never this much money in coins.”
Salesman David Crisswell said the coins included "dimes, quarters, half-dollars, silver and Susan B Anthony dollars".
The new owner of the Chevy says he does not trust banks or paper money.
“Paper money will burn, but it is hard to damage coins," the retired engineer pointed out.
"I bought four or five rolls of coins each month. I don't know how long it took me to save this amount, probably all my life.”

Orgasms 'at the touch of a button'

2008-08-08T08:17:00.001+01:00

Women around the world are being told they can now have an orgasm at the touch of a button.

And they don't mean the clitoris, it seems ;-)

See this BBC article.

I

2008-08-02T20:21:00.001+01:00

...know its saturday morning, but I was busy last night and didn't want to leave this till next week.

title="Humor videos">td>Moronic Mountain Golf Blooper

Tiger Woods birdied this hole back in January.

Get humor videos at NothingToxic

Got wind?

2008-08-01T05:37:00.002+01:00

In Denmark a wind turbine has exploded in the strong winds . WTF :-(

You tube video

stupid pet names

2008-07-27T15:11:00.001+01:00

GOOD NEWS!

2008-07-25T11:36:00.001+01:00

ok, there it's gone.

HOW TO SELL PAPERS.

2008-07-23T11:48:00.003+01:00

OK, EARLY/LATE, YOU CHOOSE. I COULDN'T LET THIS ONE WAIT.

FROM TODAYS NME. WED 23rd JULY
Bloc Party and Sex Pistols' John Lydon in 'racist attack'

Kaiser Chiefs and Foals step in after 'unprovoked' incident at festival

Bloc Party's Kele Okereke was involved in a fight with The Sex Pistols' frontman John Lydon at the Summercase festival on Saturday (July 19).

Details of a disturbance at the Spanish event first emerged when Foals frontman Yannis Philippakis mentioned he had been involved in a fight with the veteran singer while onstage at the Latitude Festival.

However, speaking today (July 21), Okereke has explained that he was the target of the attack.

Branding the incident an "unprovoked racist attack", Okereke suffered severe facial bruising, cuts to his face and body and a split lip.

The incident began as Lydon socialised with a host of British acts backstage at the Spanish festival.

According to Bloc Party, their singer approached Lydon to ask if he would ever consider reforming one of Okereke's favourite bands, Public Image Ltd.

However, in a statement from the younger band they claimed that the Sex Pistols singer "became intimidating and aggressive while his entourage responded with a racist tirade including the statement, 'Your problem is your black attitude'."

Okereke was then involved in a fight with three of Lydon's associates, at which point Foals' Philippakis and Kaiser Chiefs' Ricky Wilson stepped in to help the Bloc Party man.

The incident was broken up by festival security and was later reported to Spanish police. It was reported to police in the UK after Okereke returned.

"It's not an issue of the physical assault, even though it was an unprovoked attack, it is the fact that race was brought into the matter so readily," Okereke explained today.

"Someone as respected and as intelligent as Lydon should know better than to bring race into the equation, or socialise with and encourage those who hold such narrow-minded attitudes.

"I am disappointed that someone I held with such high regard turns out to be such a bigot."

Lydon however has since responded claiming the \"trouble was brought to us\" and the incident was down to jealousy on the younger musician's part.

NOW READ THAT AGAIN.

"his entourage responded with a racist tirade including the statement, 'Your problem is your black attitude'."
Okereke was then involved in a fight with three of Lydon's associates"

NOT LYDON. HIS ASSOCIATES.
BUT THAT WOULDN'T MAKE AS GOOD A HEADLINE.
ok, it's not right, thats a given, but would rotten ever do it? for someone with such a love of reggae, who has spent a hell of a lot of time in jamaica himself...i very much doubt it, but that doesn't sell papers eh? and it was a headline in most tabloids this weekend.
i expected more from the NME though.

Tup-aware, party? See Ewe, Jimmy!

2008-07-18T14:01:00.001+01:00

A man arrested for allegedly having sex with sheep has been banned from visiting farmland.

The 27-year-old was arrested on suspicion of bestiality by officers at his home in Dulwich, south-east London on Thursday morning.

It followed several complaints about a man molesting sheep in Botany Bay Lane, Chislehurst, in May and June.

He was bailed on the condition that he does not enter farmyards within the Metropolitan Police area.

The arrest was made when witnesses reported a man sexually assaulting sheep before running off, often leaving clothing at the scene.

More Like WTF for HumpDay

2008-07-15T15:28:00.000+01:00

Today is not even Friday, nor is it Hump Day, but I could not resist putting this in early as it truly made me wonder and shout, "WTF?!?!"

First of all, WTF is this kid doing to Spiderman?!?

It seems to have caught big recognition, but I am still dumbfounded.

WTF!?!

Dracula was a right little tit!

2008-07-11T13:44:00.001+01:00

A hotel receptionist got a shock when she felt a vibration in her underwear and realised a bat was hiding in her bra. Abbie Hawkins told the Eastern Daily Press she had felt something moving inside her clothes, but assumed it was her mobile phone. Hours later(sic!), she discovered a furry stowaway had been keeping her company since she got dressed that morning. "The night before I had had one or two drinks . . ." Yeah, nuff said.

Details here :-

http://news.sky.com/skynews/Home/Strange-News/Bat-In-Bra-Receptionist-Gets-Shock-From-Furry-Fugitive/Article/200807215028272?lpos=Strange%2BNews_0&lid=ARTICLE_15028272_Bat%2BIn%2BBra%253A%2BReceptionist%2BGets%2BShock%2BFrom%2BFurry%2BFugitive

Cash Craps

2008-07-11T13:37:00.002+01:00

The remote town of Musiri in the Tamil Nadu state has hit upon a unique idea to teach its residents proper hygiene: Pay them money each time they use the toilet. Aid(s) groups estimate that more than 330 million people in India do not have access to proper sanitation facilities. And in the case of Musiri, many residents relieve themselves on river banks, leading to infectious diseases such as dire rear (sic!). "If they ask to go three, four times a day, then something's wrong," he said. "We ask them to go to a doctor."

Details here :
http://edition.cnn.com/2008/WORLD/asiapcf/07/07/india.toilets/index.html

Shocking Split

2008-07-04T17:31:00.002+01:00

Does "People"-magazine have a new euphemism for 'Vagina'`?

I cun't say ;-)

WTF? IT'S INDEPENDENCE DAY.....

2008-07-04T13:26:00.003+01:00

and as such, i give you the following;

Tattoo ad on forehead for $10,000!

A mother had her forehead tattooed with the web address of a gambling site after auctioning off advertising space on her head to pay for her son's school fees. Karolyne Smith has to live with a permanent billboard on her forehead after she accepted Goldenpalace.com's offer of $10,000 for the 'advertising space'. She needed the money to send her son Brady to a private school. Karolyne said: ""I really want to do this. To everyone else, it seems like a stupid thing to do. To me, $10,000 is like a million dollars.", "I only live once and I'm doing it for my son. It's a small sacrifice to build a better future for my son." Karolyne did not take the decision lightly. She discussed it for more than three weeks with her boyfriend Jeremy Williams. Smith's eBay auction attracted more than 27,000 hits and 1,000 watchers. Bidding reached $999.99 before Goldenpalace.com, an Internet gambling company met Smith's $10,000 asking price. Goldenpalace.com also gave her another $5,000 for her trouble. Another person, inspired by Karolyne is currently auctioning his forehead as ad space on ebay.

"i thought about it for around three weeks"
REALLY? AS LONG AS THAT?
FUCKWIT!

WTF : Stupid criminal ;-)

2008-06-27T08:49:00.000+01:00

Judgment-Challenged: Howard Shanholtzer was arrested in Garden Grove, Calif., in May in connection with stolen security cameras(sic!). Figuring that police might be looking for his white Mitsubishi pickup truck they probably saw on surveillance video, Shanholtzer allegedly stole another pickup, but for some reason, it was another white Mitsubishi. [Orange County Register, 5-24-08]

WHERE TF IS THIS GENT? I'D LIKE TO SHAKE HIS HAND!

2008-06-27T08:39:00.000+01:00

An incident occurred in a supermarket recently, when the following was witnessed: A Muslim woman dressed in a Burkha (A black gown & face mask) was standing with her shopping in a queue at the checkout. When it was her turn to be served, and as she reached the cashier, she made a loud remark about the English Flag lapel pin, which the female cashier was wearing on her blouse. The cashier reached up and touched the pin and said, "Yes, I always wear it proudly. My son serves abroad with the forces and I wear it for him". The Muslim woman then asked the cashier when she was going to stop bombing and killing her countrymen, explaining that she was Iraqi. At that point, a Gentleman standing in the queue stepped forward, and interrupted with a calm and gentle voice, and said to the Iraqi woman: "Excuse me, but hundreds of thousands of men and women, just like this ladies son have fought and sacrificed their lives so that people just like YOU can stand here, in England, which is MY country and allow you to blatantly accuse an innocent check-out cashier of bombing YOUR countrymen". "It is my belief that if you were allowed to be as outspoken as that in Iraq, which you claim to be YOUR country, then we wouldn't need to be fighting there today". "However - now that you have learned how to speak out and criticise the English people who have afforded you the protection of MY country, I will gladly pay the cost of a ticket to help you pay your way back to Iraq". "When you get there, and if you manage to survive for being as outspoken as what you are here in England, then you should be able to help straighten out the mess which YOUR Iraqi countrymen have got you into in the first place, which appears to be the reason that you have come to MY country to avoid." Apparently the queue cheered and applauded.

Three WTF links 4 U

2008-06-27T08:23:00.003+01:00

Just three links to kick off WTF Friday today:-

1) Jordan takes up smoking?
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/tayside_and_central/7423903.stm

2) Greek club for Members only?
http://www.spiegel.de/international/zeitgeist/0,1518,553070,00.html

3) Welshman Alan Evans gets eaten alive
http://news.sky.com/skynews/article/0,,91059-1314893,00.html

Only in Sweden.....

2008-06-21T18:24:00.000+01:00

SPOT THE DIFFERENCE...

2008-06-06T12:11:00.006+01:00

FOR THE GUYS

FOR THE GALS

you can thank me later!

HOW TF?

2008-06-06T12:08:00.001+01:00

Surgeons left metal bar in my headThursday, June 5, 2008

Surgeons left a 10cm (4in) metal bar inside a teenager's head.
Donovan McGowan lived with the piece of metal inside him for three months after an operation.
The 18-year-old suffered from blinding headaches and also had an unsightly lump on the side of his head.
Eventually, he demanded a scan and it was then doctors found the bar.
'They said, “This is quite embarrassing but there is something metallic like a tube still in your head.”
It's been more than embarrassing for me having to walk about with this lump,' said Mr McGowan, from Glasgow.
The rod was left behind during an operation at Southern General Hospital, Glasgow, in March after he was hit by a car.
A hospital spokesman apologised and said it was an 'unfortunate error'. The ex-football steward, who gave up his job because of the pain, may now seek compensation from the trust.

OUCH!

She's not flushed ;-)

2008-06-05T08:09:00.001+01:00

Away tomorrow so I'm posting early ...

If

2008-06-02T16:16:00.003+01:00

...its not the Germans, it's the Japanese. What is it about people we've been to War with? I can only wonder what kind of news stories would be coming out of South America if we'd ever formally declared war on Argentina back in the day....

"TOKYO (Reuters) - A Japanese man who was mystified when food kept disappearing from his kitchen, set up a hidden camera and found an unknown woman living secretly in his closet, Japanese media said Friday.

The 57-year-old unemployed man of Fukuoka in southern Japan called police Wednesday when the camera sent pictures to his mobile phone of an intruder in his home while he was out on Wednesday, the Asahi newspaper said on its Website.

Officers rushed to the house and found a 58-year-old unemployed woman hiding in an unused closet, where she had secreted a mattress and plastic drink bottles, the Asahi said. Police suspect she may have been there for several months, the paper said.

"I didn't have anywhere to live," the Nikkan Sports tabloid quoted the woman as telling police.

Local police confirmed that they had arrested a woman for trespassing, but would not comment further on the case."

Please tell me how the hell someone lives in your cupboard, especially in a place like Japan where the flats/apartments are half the size of the UK's, which are half the size of American apartments and you don't notice for a long time? Does the guy just stumble around in a drunken haze whenever he's home or something? I'm stunned.

Listening to Dave & Ansel Collins :- Double Barrel

Heartbroken Man Climbs Into Morgue Freezer

2008-05-30T22:58:00.001+01:00

Won't be here Friday because we're out of town... so I'm putting it up now.

I couldn't resist this... Love was never so cold!!

Sorry for this mix-up--link has been corrected- sorry for the delay!!! :(

Heartbroken Man Climbs Into Morgue Freezer.

Is anyone really worth that??

Carma Sutra book

2008-05-30T18:33:00.002+01:00

And the Americans need an instruction manual?

Gives a hole(sic!) new meaning to the word 'pick-up' ;-)

So it's true...

2008-05-30T05:11:00.002+01:00

So it's true, all those posh BMWs are driven by

Bum
Mooning
Wankers.

I suppose we should be grateful that the speedcamera photo was taken in the UK ;-)

(North Tyneside, as you might have expected)

WTF? AND WE LET OUR KIDS PLAY WITH THESE THINGS?

2008-05-29T11:32:00.002+01:00

ok, early, but i'll be too busy to post tomorrow....

and if you thought this was funny, check out my early post on SICK SUNDAY !!

I

2008-05-26T03:58:00.003+01:00

...got this on Friday, so it counts.

Explanation from my friend and fellow Bastard Chris Rizzo, the unfortunate owner of the hand in the images below.
"wed nite about 10:30. I was doing some carb tuning on ye ole' 900 ss, making adjustments and cruising around my hood. I stop at the signal at 12th and morrison, and the Italian stallion is idling a bit high. ........she's runnin a little bit hot tonight, i can barely see the road from the heat comin' off,.. ease the seat back, reach down between my legs for the idle adjust screw.......WHACK.

oh shit. lift my hand up and see a bloody mangled mess. fingers filleted open and bent every which way but the right way. bikes still running though, so i drop her into gear and ride home. i grab the least greasy rag, drape it over my meat paw and jump in my truck. Four hours later in the ER the hand specialist comes in and says, 'holy shit'. Not a comforting reaction. Up to the operating room to remove my ring finger and the end of my middle finger. The OR is brand new and is equipt with a bumpin' sound system, unfortunately though the doctor happens to like Pink Floyd......

so two days later my bloody stumps and i are home with a fat stash of medical grade narcotics. My bike looks like the Bologna Chainsaw Massacre: a good splattering of blood, some finger meat scattered around the motor, and the belt for the vertical cylinder is completely derailed. Needless to say that probably bent a couple valves on my freshly built head :("

Listening to Weezer - Pork and Beans

I

2008-05-24T02:11:00.002+01:00

...love it when traditional martial arts practitioners claim their style "works", and that jiu-jitsu's ok if you get taken down, but it's easy to beat if you stay on your feet.
Check out this dude's attempt to prove said theory.

Listeing to :- Story of a lonely guy - Blink 182

So now you know......

2008-05-23T16:47:00.002+01:00

WTF may stand for:

* What the fuck, a common expression of confusion or annoyance, especially in internet slang.

* Waking the Fallen, an album by Avenged Sevenfold

* Werewolf: The Forsaken, a role-playing game developed by White Wolf Game Studio

* World Taekwondo Federation, the International Federation member of the International Olympic Committee for the sporting aspects of taekwondo

* Work Time Fun, a game for the PlayStation Portable

* Working Title Films, a United Kingdom film production company

* Walking Through Fire, album by April Wine

* Weight transfer front, weight transferred to the front of a car during cornering

* wtf, a command line acronym database that first appeared in NetBSD 1.5, and has been ported to many other Unix operating systems

* The Daily WTF, a humorous technology blog, previously known as Worse Than Failure

* WTF Froster, beverage from Mac's Convenience Stores

* Weapons Task Force, creators of the SO Mod for Delta Force: Xtreme

* Where's the Fire, a column on the tech blog Technorati.

World Taekwondo Federation eh? We don't want to upset them.....

WTF? NOPE, STILL DON'T GET IT!

2008-05-23T10:21:00.000+01:00

watched it five times now, i still don't know what it's selling! if it is at all!

Pull the other one...

2008-05-22T04:42:00.002+01:00

Be on the road friday, so this one's early. But worth it.

Bilingual Olympic Signs ;-)

2008-05-16T21:38:00.003+01:00

Some of the chinese signs for the olympics this year have hilarious colloquial translations :-)

Those Dirty Minded Christians!

2008-05-16T15:16:00.002+01:00

They're at it again... I think they have too much time on their hands. We all know that sex sells, and that there are subliminal sexual innuendo in many logos and graphics, but for the Christian groups to have nothing better to do than pick on Starbuck's, It sort of says something about where their head is at, doesn't it??

A Christian group based in San Diego found grounds for outrage over the new retro-style logo.

Geez, get your minds out of the gutter and go back to prayer meeting guys!! :)

Cheers! . . . .WTF!!!

2008-05-16T13:47:00.001+01:00

just don't clink your glasses too hard, folks....

AND THEY CALL IT PUUPY LOVE

2008-05-16T12:20:00.000+01:00

Two German Shepherd dogs have been taken into care after their owner was accused of sexually assaulting them.
The two pets were allegedly "repeatedly" abused by the man, who lived with his mother.
Animal wardens took possession of the dogs following complaints.
They have asked a judge to give them permanent custody of the dogs.
Palm Beach attorney Shannon Fox said the man had repeatedly performed sexual acts with the animals.
But he may escape prosecution because bestiality is not a crime in his home state of Florida.
Earlier this year, Florida Senator Nan Rich tried to pass a law stopping people from "knowingly" committing bestiality or allowing others to.
But so far its progress through has been slow.
She said: "I think people are just uncomfortable with the subject matter.
"It's just unfortunate that there's just not more ways to prosecute these atrocious acts, because there is so much evidence they are an indicator of other sexually deviant crimes."

Dude...

2008-05-09T19:40:00.005+01:00

HOUSTON (Reuters) - Authorities in Texas have filed corpse-abuse charges against two men who allegedly removed a skull from a grave and used it as a bong.

The Harris County District Attorney's Office confirmed on Thursday that misdemeanor abuse of corpse charges have been filed in the case.

One of the men allegedly told police they dug up a grave in an abandoned cemetery in the woods, removed a head from a body and smoked marijuana using the skull as a bong.

Police found the cemetery and a grave that had been disturbed but are still investigating the rest of the story, officials said.

Two different people using a skull as a bong to "Smoke da chronic"

Listening to Leftfield - Swords

Xmas letter from Shawn ;-)

2008-05-09T10:39:00.001+01:00

WTF? HEADLINE OF THE WEEK?

2008-05-09T09:56:00.001+01:00

Plummeting urine narrowly misses woman.

A plane, dropping wee-bombs!
A shop assistant was almost crushed by a lump of frozen urine which fell 10,000m (33,000ft) from a plane and landed at her feet.
Joanne Bojas, 25, was walking to work when the 20kg (44lb) lump of frozen toilet waste fell from the sky.
The shocked 25-year-old from Chelmsford, Essex, said: 'It was unbelievable; if it had hit me on the head I would have been killed.'

I BET SHE SHIT HERSELF!!

WTF? GET A FUCKING LIFE YOU SAD FUCKING FUCK!

2008-05-09T09:42:00.002+01:00

Star Trek fan Bob Prior has boldly gone where it's safe to say no man has gone before.
The Trekkie has built sets and characters from the sci-fi show out of packets of Rice Krispies.

His 50 models include the Starship Enterprise, its command bridge and captains James T Kirk and Jean-Luc Picard.
The car park attendant, who says his favourite characters are Kirk, Scotty and McCoy, took six months to put together his cardboard collection, and roped in sons Nigel, 25, and Daniel, 20.
Mr Prior said: 'I just love Star Trek – I loved it since the first series.
'I've made models from the start – right through Deep Space Nine, Voyager and the films up to First Contact.'

Beamed up: Mr Prior’s creations include the Enterprise bridge

But the 52-year-old said his wife, Alison, was not a fan of the show.
'She thinks its like a museum in here, although she's very good and puts up with it,' he added.
Mr Prior, from Ramsgate, Kent, said he got the buzz for cardboard models when he was with the Canterbury Model Railway Society.

The final frontier: Some of Mr Prior’s cardboard spaceships – and his Lara Croft

'I started off when a member showed me a train built out of card,' he said. 'Since then, I've had a ships phase, a railway phase and more recently I've got into space models.'
His other creations include a 4.5m (15ft) Titanic and a 3m (10ft) Apollo 11 craft.

PUT DOWN YOUR PHASER, OPEN THE DOOR, AND THROW YOURSELF IN FRONT OF THE FIRST LORRY YOU SEE!
i bet the saddo can speak klingon too!
"and roped in sons Nigel, 25, and Daniel, 20." i bet he did. spot the contenders for that areas next rapists! get out, meet girls, drink white lightning, smoke a joint and do what you you should have been doing whilst cooped up with your freak of a father. fuck me, that twisted cunt in austria treated his kids better, and he locked em in a cellar for 24 years!!

the biggest shock here is he' s actually married and has kids. (adopted? not his?)

by the way, did i mention i hate star trek and anything associated with it?

no?

oh well.

Who needs Airbags?

2008-05-09T05:06:00.002+01:00

Sorry

2008-05-03T18:13:00.000+01:00

...I'm late this week, Enjoy.

Listening to Throwing Muses - Dizzy

WTF? HOW COULD THEY NOT KNOW?

2008-05-03T14:17:00.002+01:00

yeah i'ts late. i've been busy!

but check this one out!

mistaken identity

Local Warming :-(

2008-05-03T04:38:00.003+01:00

In the UK local council elections the BNP won seats for 10 councilors, whereas the Green party won but 5.

WTF? :-(

PS: Barnsley was one of those places, I heard.

One Sick Fuck

2008-05-02T23:50:00.002+01:00

This is all I can think of "WTF", but it's sure as hell one of the worst damn stories that I have seen in a WHILE! This is totally SICK... You've probably already read about it, but I just recently caught up to the story. Click Link Below>>

Pictured: Inside the cellar where father locked daughter for 24 years and repeatedly raped her

Happy Friday... AJ

CONGRATULATIONS A.J.

2008-04-27T06:15:00.003+01:00

Nice roadside ad :-)

2008-04-25T19:34:00.002+01:00

Killer Biscuits Running Loose

2008-04-25T16:55:00.001+01:00

WTF? THATS GOTTA REALLY HURT!

2008-04-25T12:58:00.002+01:00

ok, this is a blink and you'll miss it deal, but also an OW! FUCK ME! OW OW OW OW!! SHIT, NO FUCKING WAY! kinda deal too.

Inappropriate headline ?

2008-04-25T09:46:00.000+01:00

Headline from Sky News (as seen on http://skynews4.typepad.com/my_weblog/2008/04/mccanns-want-to.html)

"McCanns Keen For Madeleine Reconstruction"

WTF? Shades of Humpty-Dumpty!

I should worry!

2008-04-25T05:22:00.002+01:00

This video is for Jihad Punk and his addicktion ;-)
It also explains how I got to be so good at mental arithmetic,
AND why Americans are so sabre-rattling belligerent as a
nation...

See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWG3mlxsuUk

Have

2008-04-25T03:18:00.002+01:00

...to get mine in early or late as I'll be at work tomorrow, so I choose early. Sue me.

Andre Bach Takes Base Jumping to New Level of Insane

When he dies, you can find his balls on display at Ripley's.

This guy is fucking bonkers.

Listening to Lee Cabrera - I Watch You (Bermudez & Klubjumpers Peeping Tom Mix)

WHY TF HAVE I NEVER SEEN THIS GUY BEFORE?

2008-04-18T08:31:00.002+01:00

ventriloquists...you either love em or hate em.

this guy is my new hero!

PAUL ZERDIN

The

2008-04-18T02:37:00.002+01:00

...Germans haven't let me down this week.
Sorry it's early but I won't have time tomorrow.

"BERLIN - Police in Germany were shocked to find a man running down a major highway pulling a three-wheeled trailer -- but even more surprised to learn he was a Polish pilgrim on a 3,000 km (1,800 mile) trek.

Motorists near Coburg in Bavaria saw the man towing a load with a rod attached to his back and called police.

"Officers' initial astonishment quickly turned into admiration," a police statement said on Tuesday.

After questioning the man, police discovered he was a devout Roman Catholic Pole on his way home from a European pilgrimage that had taken him as far as Portugal.

Inside a converted roof luggage box, which also served as a bivouac, the 35-year-old was carrying all he needed for the journey, police said. After inspecting the vehicle, officers declared it roadworthy and sent him on his way."

In this age of hybrid cars, high speed rail and flights for $49, WTF was this dude up to?

Maybe he'd seen this picture and decided his cart was better off without the ass

All you can possibly say is

2008-04-17T22:31:00.000+01:00

WTF???????